Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
16 years ago
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
Guildmember
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Day 13 7pm
Ever had one of those days when you have an irritating song stuck in your head and you just can't get it out? Well, I had one of them. Relward started humming this silly jaunt in the baths this morning and I haven't been able to shift it yet. I must look like a right pansy humming and tripping about the yard today. All blame must lay on Relward and his musical-liking ways. He couldn't be more in the closet if he was a man who repaired the insides of cupboards. Of course, Erin seems almost as oblivious to this as Relward, as she seems to be accepting of his attempts at trying to hard not to be what he frankly is.
I am, of course, talking about him being a fashion designer. He's rather terrible at it. Tried to get me to change from jumpers to vest. It's just never going to happen. I'm a jumper man. But his constant awful advice to Erin is hiding nothing--I've seen the inside of his cupboard.
But no matter, he got this ridiculous song into my head and it's frankly going to take me days to get over it. I think I will have to console myself by looking in the mirror for a few hours. It always has a calming effect...
Gilberts Diary
Spring Day 13 10pm
Well, the mirror has smashed and now I cannot look at my gorgeous face. What will I do? It's not like I can stare at any other man here and see my wonderous beauty looking back at me. Sigh. Woe is me. Frankly, I am sick of everything! Can't I just have a decent holiday? All I want is a little pieace and quiet and no disturbances from filthy half - blood gypsies! They taint my tea!
I am so tierd! Tomorrow we're supposed to be meeting with some council or whatever, frankly, I do not care. I'm busting my knuckles for these half breeds and then I'm supposed to get up at the crack of dawn for a meeting?? I'm supposed to be a leader here!
Oh well. At least I can do something about Relward. I'm sure the dogs will be more than happy when they feed on his right leg.
Gilbert's Diary
Spring, Day 14, 10am
Turns out it was a hunt, blast it. How am I supposed to keep my eye on that gay - no, no, straight, straight - gypsy Elspeth and her funny little outbursts if I'm off gallivanting about the hills looking dashing?
I mean, if she were there and could see me being dashing...
Well, at least I'll be away from Erin for a few days. She's looking disturbingly pleased with herself - over what, I dread to think. She hasn't found out some way to bond me by proxy, has she? I wouldn't put it past her to marry me when I'm not there. Reminder to self: must look through law books in Druid's library to see if this is possible, although I doubt it would stop Erin even if it weren't.
However, this will give me ample time to finish perfecting my New And Improved Wink. If that doesn't win the g - straight gypsy girl over, I don't know what will.
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
16 years ago
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
Guildmember
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Day 14 12pm
Okay, now I'm a little annoyed. Relward has gone and decorated my saddle again. I have just spent the past two hours trying to get rid of the sequin studs. Seriously, he's gone too far now. I understand, I do, he only did it because the light reflecting off the sequins will bounce into my eyes and make them sparkle--all the better for winking. Then there's the whole sparkling as you ride up to someone, making it hard for them to initially see you. Makes for a good entrance.
But pink? Honestly Relward, you're taking this trying-to-put-Erin-off thing a bit too far. My fingers are so sore, I'm going to have to soak them in lavender water tonight in the hopes I might be able to get them back to their soft smooth selves. Oh the effort. Silly Relward.
Spring Day 15
Can not locate my cloak. Left it at the barracks yesterday and now it is gone. this is ridiculous.
Sure it is Spring but how am i ever to remain dashing with decorated sandles and no long flowing cloak?
Fingers are absolutley ruined - possibly perminatly.
Ran into Gilaine who was most sympathetic nodding and smiling as I told her my woes. She onated soem of her best honeyballs to make me feel better and I am sure they were even better than Erin's. So very different those twins.
it makes the Drui look more the fool if you want my opinion. We need a bit more diversity around her. Sudden image of Relward dressed in a ladies frock. Diversity not ecentric. Wonder how long the gypsies will be staying.
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
16 years ago
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
Guildmember
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Day 15 3pm
Managed to find my cloak, but upon returning to my room I discovered all my jumpers had been taken and replaced with vests. I am not a vests man, I have explained this to Relward on several occasions. So this is it, there is nothing else i can do. I shall have to kill Relward. It's a pity, as I'm sure to get blood stains on this pretty new cloak. Maybe I shall wear a vest instead.
Spring Day 15 4:30pm
You know what, this vest doesn't look half bad on me. It shows off my perfectly sculpted shoulders. Maybe I won't have to kill Relward after all...
Spring Day15 7pm
Dinner this evening was very strange. I tried to get some reaction from the ladies by wearing my new vest-and-cloak combo, but Gilaine was staring at that Daft guy all evening and the ga- straight gypsy girl just looked at me like I'd gone mad and didn't notice my sculpted biceps at all. Even Erin seemed caught up in her own thoughts and she normally notices everything people wear.
Maybe I can relax on the working out thing. If nobody notices my perfectly sculpted muscles, what's the point?
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
16 years ago
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
Guildmember
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Day 16 3am
Am most depressed. Cannot sleep. Have spent hours staring at self in mirror (stole mirror from Erin, I doubt she'll notice). Can't think of anything else I could have done. Obviously I have lost my magic charm and no one thinks I'm gorgeous any more. All my hard work is ruined, and I just don't know what to do.
What is the point of living if I can't be beautiful?
Gilbert's Diary
Spring, Day 16, 4am
Spent another hour in front of the mirror. (Wonder if the bags under my eyes will just make things worse.) Can not be ungorgeous. Am too pretty, it can't just go away in a day. Have not lost magic, no, it's impossible. It's the women who have something wrong with them. Yes. The women.
Why must Relward be the only sane one around here? Most depressing thought. Need chocolate.
4:30am
Oh, Lud, I have lost my magic, haven't I?
4:45am
No. I just need to work harder on my wink. Or maybe even something totally new - maybe that's just it, I've been overusing the same old techniques!
So, what would dazzle the world anew? Humorous grin? Air of almost tangible charm? Highlights?
5am
Wait. Must consult mirror again.
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
16 years ago
Keeper of the Sherbet Lemons
Guildmember
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Diary 16 6am
I dnt feel well. Supossed t go hunting bt sssssoooo tired. Rellyward keeps telling me to wke up, but Iss t tiredd. I,m ugly annnn tiredc.
im uglee an uselesss canna do anythn right ugly shhmugglyy. I gtta go hnyt thngss.
Spring Day 16
3:30pm
Um, well, feeling a little bit better now. I'm not entirely sure what I did today, but I do know that the two hours sleep underneath the barracks has made me feel a little bit better. Though I do have this atrocious headache.
I had this very strange dream where Erin was flouncing in front of me, shaking the skirts of this most revolting dress you have ever seen. I mean, honestly, do you need that many bright pink cloth flowers on a dress? I don't believe it helped the head ache at all.
Well, I'm off to try and grab another hour or so sleep before dinner. Can't have these terrible dark circles under the eyes in front of the girls. I might just have to borrow some of Relward's concealer.
Mystic Guilden
16 years ago
Thu Oct 18 2007, 11:14am
Mystic Guilden
Mage
Gilbert's Diary
Spring Day 17 12 noon.
I think I have it. The perfect solution! All thanks to hours infront of a mirror.
I am going for a wink and grin combo. What's so different about that you say?
It is a very controled grim for one. A slow sexy grin, but without looking sleazy...like Relward's.
Have just noticed above spelling error, i meant grin not grim...my smile could never be grim.... its just not physically possible for me.
Must find a girl to test grin on. Oh, someone is approaching the library.
Spring Day 17
2pm
It was only Erin. Was going to test wink and grin, but it might be dangrous. Have resovled to await the gypsy Elspeth and test it on her.
The good news is, Relward's concealer worked a treat, Erin didnt say a thing about my bags...though she said plenty of other things. That girl can talk!
16 years ago
Fri Oct 19 2007, 08:43pm
Gilbert's Diary
Spring, Day 17
10 pm
Have been winking for alomst nine hours, and now I'm off to find Erin. I'm sure my charm will be bound to impress her. Well, not like last time. I think I had something in my teeth because she gave a fit of a giggle and ran off. I thought my new gel would do the trick. Mental note: Must use more. Anyway, it's not like my hair isn't good enough to need it anyway. I just like the sparkle it brought to it. It matches my new shoes.
10:30 pm
Cannot find Erin. I must send reinforcements to find her!
post edited due to some innappropriateness ~~ Elspeth
Mystic Ward
16 years ago
Mystic Ward
Twentyfamilies Gypsy
Spring Day 17, 11pm.
Well I found Erin and she certaianly hasn't run of with the Gypsy. I thought I might wet myself laughing when they told me she's been locked in a chest most of the day, and didn't she have a tantrum when they finally got her out. Apparently the gypsy wench and her friends have gone missing so we'll be stting out real soon to find them and bring them back. Then I'll teach her a thing or two. Poor Relward's lost his bondmate and all. Oh well off to it.
16 years ago
Fri Oct 19 2007, 05:22pm
Spring, Day 18, 6pm.
Spend the day wandering around camp in a daze; not even Erin's sulking could cheer me up.
We stumbled across the gypsies as they took off in a raft...down into a cave, on the Suggredoon. Raging waters, boiling skies, tossing winds, all very poetic. I'd appreciate it more if there was a chance they could have survived.
Relward's already written some horrible verses about it - why does he always insist on reading them out to me? Stuff about death's sweet embrace and the hungry open mouth that was the cave entrance. The man has no sense of rhyme scheme or metaphor.
The worst part is, I couldn't ask that Elspeth girl the question that's been burning up inside me all day. In desperation I tried calling it out to her as she disappeared.
"Does this vest make me look fat?" I screamed.
She just gave me a bewildered look. I knew it! I knew it made look fat! Last time I take Relward's fashion advice.
Mystic Ward
16 years ago
Mystic Ward
Twentyfamilies Gypsy
Spring Day 19, 8pm
I really must get myself together and forget about standing in front of the mirror. All that twisting and turning to look at myself from every angle has put quite a crick in my neck. I can't believe the wench thought I looked fat. The mirror tells me i look really handsome. i won't believe her, I won't!!
Blast it all, it's time to go down to nightmeal and I'll have to put up with Erin pouting all over me and Relward's horrible verse. Maybe I can miss it just for tonight?? Mmmm better not, The Fruid might not like it if his best armsman doesn't turn up for dinner, but I AM NOT wearing this stupid vest!
Spring Day 19, 9pm
Ok, so I'm stuck with this vest, but at least my bum looks good in these pants. I'm sure I saw that gypsy [censored] checking me out. I can't believe the type of mongrel Lud gave this Earth.
I walked down to nightmeal without any problems, but I've noticed they've moved the mirror. That will have to be changed. It was my personal favourite and reflected my inner style.
Nightmeal was a mess. I had a blasted argument with Erin about Relward. Why can't the woman make up her mind? She wont speak to me now *sigh* At least I have my looks to comfort me.
Spring Day 22, 10:AM
I am most sorry o! diary, for missing my hourly logue but other things came up,,, oh don't cry you'll smudge my writing,, you stupid book!!*
Ariel brought back a most marvelous mirror for my personal use. The Blue Topaz edge perfectly compliments my skin tone. Erin is talking to me again, but I think I would rather talk to Gilaine, after all she does need to dye her hair, unlike some girls I know (Erin,,Erin,,Erin!) I could have spent hours complimenting Gilaine, but that stupid oaf Relward caught on to my game, and now I wish I knew where the pretty gypsy went.
Mystic Ward
15 years ago
Mystic Ward
Twentyfamilies Gypsy
Winter Day 1, 11pm
Oh My Lud! I don't believe what has happened to me these past few months. Everything went to pot around here so I took off for the West Coast and had to hide...can you believe it Dear Diary..... I HAD TO HIDE!! from that witch Erin. Her and her pretty boy tried to capture me and send me off to Lud knows where as a slave. Me! A slave....I don't think so! I look way too good in these Land clothes to want to have to wear rags, and I'm an ARMSMAN! Lud dammit! Not one to grub about in the dirt. Well thank Lud I am finially reunited with you my Dear Diary. I do appologise for leaving you hidden in that burnt out old shack for so long, but certain folk over this side, just wouldn't understand.
Winter Day 4, 4pm
There are some days when i just don't feel the motivation to get up. What's the point? I have no reason to get up and look dashing or make Erin jealous anymore. I was certain that the ga- straight gypsy girl was most likely skewered on a pointy rock after that rafting stunt. But this morning i was incredibly glad i got up. Why? Because I saw her! I swear to Lud i saw her... I'm so certain it was the rather fetching gypsy girl! But her skin had changed colour to the point it looked like she wasn't a gypsy.... and her face was a little different.... and i heard someone call her Serra....
I must think about this.
5pm
Have thought about this extensively and have decided that either this 'Serra' is merely mimicking my gypsy girl to catch my attention... Afterall i did catch her eyeing my biceps. Or she is that gypsy girl and she is pretending to be someone who is pretending to be the gypsy girl who is pretnding to be someone else so that i think it isnt her and continue on my way. I have decided to investigate this further.
Wanderer Ward
15 years ago
Wanderer Ward
Rebel
Winter Day 6, 1pm
Have spent last couple of days flexing biceps and winking at this Serra whenever I pass her. Still not certain as to whether or not she is the gypsy girl. Plan on going to the market today to try and get a response from her.
3pm
Serra girl seems to be particularly recpetive to bicep flexing and winking. Tried my super-dashing-smile on her as I passed her in the market and she was clearly impressed. Hopefully she will come and talk to me if I loiter by the fountain long enough.
3.15
She still hasn't come to talk to me...
3.17
How long am I supposed to wait? I am the most attractive armsman in this city, she really ought to be flattered by my attentions and come talk to me.
7pm
Decided that my presence was so overwhelming that she would be too intimidated by my obviously stunning physique to come talk to me herself, so decided to go ask her on a date. She said yes naturally. Though at first she tried to refuse, something about having to wash her hair, I suspect she was just overwhelmed still. Perhaps she realises that she isn't really worthy of my attentions. Must find a suitably stunning outfit for the date.
Mystic Ward
15 years ago
Mystic Ward
Twentyfamilies Gypsy
Winter day 7, 10am.
What am I going to do? I've pulled apart my cupborad and tried on everything I own, but just can't find a thing to wear. My date is in 8 hours and I have nothing to wear. Oh Lud, then I have to do my hair and nails. Where's Erin when you need her! I'll just have to run into Morganna and see if they have any fanbulous outfits I get. Not that I NEED a fabulous outfit to impress Serra the gypsie who might or might not be my gypsy, but a fabulous outfit will make me feel, well....... fabulous.
Wanderer Ward
15 years ago
Sat Jun 07 2008, 10:52pm
Wanderer Ward
Rebel
Winter day 7, 2pm.
Found the most fabulous outfit in existance. Thank Lud for there being at least one good stall in Morganna. The woman agreed that the colour of the shirt would make my eyes look pretty. She reminded me of Erin actually, but Erin would never be working at a stall in a market in Morganna. Thats just a ridiculous idea. Almost as ridiculous as the idea the gypsy could have survived. But we shall see this evening when I meet Serra. Even if she isn't I ought to keep her around for a while, it might put off that armsman with the blonde hair who keeps commenting on my outfits... Also bought a new mirror at the market so I can now see my fabulous outfit from several angles all at once.
15 years ago
Mon Jun 09 2008, 09:16am
Winter day 8, 3 am
Can't sleep, can't sleep! All I can think about is my weight. I really should have eaten parsley instead of turnip. How could I do such a thing??
Saw that gypsy halfbreed gobbling up some muck. That skinny little thing! - she ought to be starved. I'n convinced she's part of some conspiracy, but I haven't any time to ponder on it.
Oh drats and bother! These mirrors aren't long enough to reflect my thighs! Whatever will I do? I cannot believe I ate those turnips! Now my bum shall wobble like crazy. What if some ellibible bachalorette notices? My life will be ruined!!
Still, my hair looks good.
Winter Day 16, 10 am
I do apologise for my blatant disregard of your feelings, diary, but I have discovered something much more agreeable than pouring my heart and soul and true body weight into a book. I'm in love!
The only reason for this entry is to record the fact that I have finally burned off the excess kilojoules from those turnips, now to work off all that pasta I've been eating for the past sevenday.
15 years ago
Sun Aug 10 2008, 05:23pm
Erin's Diary
winter day 16
11am
I felt positvely lazy today, but when i hear that Ariel was returning from the hunt of gilbert (that stunning, dashing,sexy...betrayer) i thought i should take my chances to impress him. Im off to get dressed.
2 pm
When i was at midmeal father mentioned to me the Ariel wasnt coming untill tomorrow. Silly, unpunctual man! i was all dressed up and nice (if i do say so myself) for him. Ah well i will have to look better tomorrow. While i was eating i was going over my plan for Gilane to be bonded, the silly girl was so ungratefull. Relward was looking at me again. I almost had mind to tell him may face was up here.
5 pm
i have decided to wear the blue dress tomorrow, i hope he comes, my hair is looking magnicicent at the moment. hmm i might go to sleep early tonight..extra beauty sleep..not that i need it.